I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize