i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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