I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
