Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
