This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
