and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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