it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
