To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Who died my cat blue again?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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