U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
