can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
