dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
NoShamevember. You game?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
