An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
