What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I currently don't understand fingers.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
