i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
