Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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