That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
