Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
