South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
