At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
