ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
