so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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