So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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