She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
