they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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