Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Randomize