"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
