I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
