Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
