I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
