So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
