As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
