I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
