I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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