just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize