im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Sponge bath it is.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize