I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize