so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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