Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize