i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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