i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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