got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize