Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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