If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
