Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
pop tarts are not kleenex
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
