you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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