We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
