I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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