Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
jump out the window naked night went bad
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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