i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
