if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
