so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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