do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
